


All Sides

by Lazy8



Series: Forging Connections [6]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, Rare Pairings, Sparring
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-10
Updated: 2016-07-10
Packaged: 2018-07-22 17:54:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7448548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lazy8/pseuds/Lazy8
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Her strength might be very different from his, but that doesn't mean he doesn't respect it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All Sides

**Author's Note:**

> Point in Timeline: Several years post-canon
> 
> Level of Explicitness: Confessions and cuddles; G-rated romance

For most of Aang's life, it had been a given that benders had amazing powers. Katara had brought him back from the dead. Toph could see without seeing at all. Aang himself had so much raw destructive power that it sometimes frightened him—he could raise the sea, take away bending, or kill with a thought. Having mastery over a whole element—not to mention all four—brought with it enormous power, and it was that kind of power that made for the most legendary heroes and the most feared villains.

Perhaps that was why Suki fascinated him so much.

Aang would never demean Sokka's value to the team, but his contributions had been through quick thinking and an incredible skill with his weapon of choice. With Sokka, it had never been about strength. Suki pulled her weight in an entirely different way.

During their journey across Serpent's Pass, Aang knew Suki had dived into the water to save Toph from drowning, and she'd done it in full Kyoshi gear. When they were camped out at the Western Air Temple, he'd seen her challenge Zuko to a match and win. Granted, Zuko might not have been giving it his all, due to guilt over burning down her village and reluctance to go all out against a nonbender, but that was far from her only accomplishment. Sokka had repeatedly described how she'd climbed over several buildings and dozens of people to take the warden of the Boiling Rock as a hostage, without harming anyone else and without breaking a sweat. Even after the end of the war, he'd seen her go up against firebenders, earthbenders, and sometimes both at once, and come out on top again and again.

When he thought about it, Aang thought that what fascinated him the most was that Suki had managed to accomplish all of this without mastery over even a single element. He might have been the most powerful person in the world, but he'd been born with the Avatar Spirit.  _His_  power was his destiny, his birthright. Not only was Suki strong, but she'd  _earned_  her strength.

When she asked if he was up for a friendly sparring match, Aang naturally agreed.

"Any particular reason you wanted to spar with me?" he could not help but ask as they took their places.

"Well, beating Sokka is too easy and Zuko always holds back. At least with you, I know I'll have a worthy opponent."

They started with only one element at a time. It would be a challenge, for him to keep increasing the levels, so to speak.

"Fire," she said, when Aang asked where she'd most like to start. "That's the one I'm most used to fighting, and we might as well start with something familiar."

It was also the element he was least comfortable with. After all, he'd already hurt one person he cared about through his lack of control, and though he knew that he had to accept it and master this part of himself rather than pushing it away, he was still learning where the line was between respecting the element and letting his fear of it control him. It didn't help, either, that every other time Aang had used firebending in sparring, it had been against Zuko, who knew what he was doing and was experienced enough to get things back under control if Aang made a mistake. If he let the flames get out of hand against Suki, he knew, she did not have the luxury of being able to bend them to her own will instead.

"No offense, but maaaaybe we should have Zuko here," he ventured the first time. "You know, in case I lose control by accident..."

" _No_ ," she growled, and Aang never made that suggestion again.

As he watched Suki duck and roll and sometimes even run straight  _through_  the flames, however, Aang began to realize why the suggestion of having a firebender present would have offended her. Suki  _did_  have control, of the situation if not of the element. She'd spent the past several years fighting against people who'd been  _trying_  to hurt her. The one time he did have a lapse in concentration, allowing a flame to grow to dangerous proportions, he still couldn't help but yell, "Suki, look out!"—only to feel a blow against his arm, which immediately fell limp at his side. The flames went out.

"Thanks," he panted, sinking to the ground and using his working hand to cover his face. He let out a groan. "I  _thought_  my control had gotten better than that."

"I didn't hurt you, did I?" She was kneeling beside him, a look of concern on her face. "I didn't want to use chi blocking on an actual person until I'd gotten a bit better at it, but..."

"No, it's just numb." Aang rubbed his shoulder. " _This_  is why I didn't want to do this without some supervision. It's not that I don't respect your skills as a warrior; I don't trust  _myself_. What if I burn you the next time?"

"If I get burned, I get burned. Wouldn't be the first time it's happened." Aang turned to look at her incredulously, and she only shrugged in response. "I'm hardly going to die from an accident, Aang. If you're going to spar—with anyone—that means taking a few risks. The important thing is that I know what those risks are and I'm ready to accept them."

It wasn't until that day that it occurred to him that Suki might be able to help him as much as he could help her.

Earth was another one that had always been hard for him, because it was his natural opposite. Whereas he was wary of fire because it was  _too_  eager, earth didn't want to move unless forced, and it simply was not in his nature to force. Aang still had to focus more than with any other element to get the rocks to move to his will.

Of course, that said nothing whatsoever about his ability to  _listen_.

"How much... did Toph teach you?" she panted after Aang had seen her coming and thrown her on her back for the fifth time that day.

"Well, she  _is_  the only human I could have learned this from." He offered a hand, and Suki allowed him to pull her to her feet. "It saved my life against Ozai, so I'm not about to let myself go rusty."

As they continued to progress with earth, however, it became clear that his proficiency at seismic sensing wasn't the only thing that was giving her trouble. Last time, Suki had been thrown off by some of his fancier tricks but had quickly figured out ways to counter them. Now, she was throwing herself against the same wall again and again—sometimes quite literally.

"Is something wrong?" Aang finally asked, when a rock he thought she'd have been able to dodge left her cradling her arm and gasping in pain. "You seem kind of distracted."

"Nothing you can help me with." She gritted her teeth as she pushed up her sleeve; leaning in to look, Aang saw that it thankfully was not broken, only bruised—but it was still pretty bad as far as bruises went.

"Too bad Katara isn't here. She could have fixed that up in two seconds flat." Nevertheless, he pulled a bit of water from the well they'd been using for drinking, and froze it before wrapping it in a scrap of cloth and handing it over so she could hold it to her arm. "And I don't know about that. I might not be able to fix your problem, but sometimes even just talking about it can help."

For a few seconds she hesitated, her eyes squeezed closed, but then let out a sigh. "Sokka and I have been having some issues."

"You had a fight?" he guessed. Sokka and Suki had always seemed like such a perfect couple, but... well, everyone fought  _once_  in a while.

Suki, however, shook her head. "We haven't been fighting—we haven't been saying much to each other at all, actually." With a sigh, she folded her legs, and Aang sank down to join her on the ground. "He spends so much time running off to the Fire Nation or the Earth Kingdom—which is fine, he's needed—but then when we do get time together, all he can seem to talk about is Yue, Yue, Yue." She handed the cold pack back over to Aang so that he could re-freeze it—it  _was_  a rather hot day—and checked the swelling with a grimace. "I mean... I know she was someone he cared about and I'm trying to be understanding, but sometimes I'm not sure whether Sokka thinks he's with me or her."

"Well, I can't really judge without hearing Sokka's side as well." Aang handed back the ice, which she accepted with a nod of thanks. "But I was there at the North Pole. Yue made a great personal sacrifice and saved us all, but it tore Sokka to pieces—he'd promised to protect her only the day before. It seemed like he'd moved on, but... maybe he hasn't. At least if he's talking about it, that means he feels safe enough to open up to you."

"Maybe you're right." She stood with a stretch, though still holding her injured arm gingerly against her chest. "Thanks, Aang."

They got the rest of the way through earth much more smoothly. Suki, as always, adapted, using flying leaps to dodge his seismic sensing and jumping off of boulders even as he threw them at her. Aang was glad; he assumed that her renewed ability to concentrate meant that she and Sokka had worked out the worst of their relationship problems. As they moved on to water, however, he began having some problems of his own.

He and Katara had fought. As with many arguments, it had started with something little that hadn't even occurred to him would have been a problem—but as it turned out, it had mattered very much to Katara.

_"Why can't you spend some time_ _here_ _for a change?" Aang, who'd only asked her to accompany him to celebrate the official holiday that commemorated the founding of Republic City, was taken aback by the vehemence of her reaction. "It seems like every other week you're dragging me off to some other continent!"_

_"That didn't seem to bother you very much the first time!" She turned away from him, crossing her arms. "Look, Katara, I'm trying to understand. But I can't just settle down here in the South Pole. I'm the Avatar. The world needs me."_

_"And my_ _family_ _needs_ _me_ _! Don't ask me to choose between them and you."_

"Hey, Suki?"

"Hm?" They had just finished sparring for the day, and she was currently in the process of wiping the sweat from her face, but looked up curiously when Aang said her name.

"What would you do if you had to choose between your duties to a person and your duties to the world?"

A line appeared between her eyebrows at the question, but she did not ask him to elaborate. "Well," she said slowly, "if this is Avatar stuff, I can't exactly relate." She seated herself on a wide rock next to the stream, patting the top in invitation for Aang to do the same. "But I do remember what my auntie always said, when she was teaching us the warriors' code. Don't ever make a promise you're not sure you can keep."

That night, he lay awake in bed, staring at the pale white stone that he held in his hand. He hadn't started carving it yet, had only been experimentally bending it to the perfect size and shape. When he turned sixteen in a few months, he'd thought, then he could start.

Marriage was not an Air Nomad tradition. Theirs was the element of freedom, and while love was certainly endorsed and commitment respected for those who chose it, it was not the prerogative of a whole nation to tell any two people when or where or with whom they should commit, nor to dictate how people should live their lives whether together or apart. In adopting some of the Water Tribe's traditions, Aang had thought that he was respecting Katara's freedom. Never had it occurred to him that instead, he might end up sacrificing his own.

That winter, on his sixteenth birthday, he stood before Katara and told her he could not give her the care and commitment she deserved, and that he hoped that someday she might find a man who could, because his first duty was and always would be to the world. When he was finished, she only gave a jerky nod, before launching herself forward and wrapping her arms around his shoulders. Aang let out a sigh as he breathed in her scent one last time.

"Somehow, I always knew it would end this way," she whispered as they pulled apart.

"Still," he returned, "I'm glad for what we had."

Before he left the South Pole, Aang walked to the edge of the ice. The water before him was dark and still, with no sign of life stirring its quiet depths. Kneeling, he reached into his robes and pulled out the stone. He hadn't yet settled on what exactly he'd wanted to carve there—the symbol for airbending on one side, perhaps, a waterbender's mark on the other. Now, he knew, it would forever remain blank.

Icy water numbed his fingers as he slipped his hand beneath the surface. Even if he had wanted to (even though he  _did_  want to), he couldn't have kept his hold when his fingers burned with cold; the stone slipped from his grasp, and Aang let it go, watching the small white disk until it sank out of sight.

* * *

"Hey, are you okay?"

Aang looked up, and a smile spread over his face when he saw Suki watching him from the edge of the clearing where they'd agreed to practice with airbending. She was out of uniform today, her hair tied back into a simple wolf tail and her fans tucked into her belt. "Sokka told me what happened," she added by way of explanation.

"I think that I will be." He did not pause in his circle walking, but made sure to savor the caress of the air currents that danced all around him. "It took me a long while to learn this, but sometimes, the only real way to be okay is to let go."

* * *

After they had finished with single elements, they started in on two: earth and water, fire and air. Suki, as usual, had a bit of trouble whenever they adopted a new combination but adapted naturally, and Aang also found himself thinking harder about how to use the elements in tandem: not just bending two at once, but making them work together, in harmony. Earth channeled water and wind fanned flames, and he and Suki moved over and around each other in a dance of violence that grew increasingly more sophisticated the longer they practiced.

"You know," Aang admitted one day, "I think I've learned more from sparring with you than I have from any bending master."

"I'm flattered," she replied with a smile, wringing out her hair; they had just finished with a particularly intense session involving water and earth, and by the time they were through they'd both needed to wash off the mud in the nearby stream. "But I honestly don't know how much longer I'll be able to keep up with you."

"Don't say that." Aang seated himself on the bank of the stream, folding his legs on the wide rock beneath him. "I've got all four elements, and sometimes I have a hard time keeping up with  _you_. Besides, the monks always taught me that it's not the abilities you were born with that matter most, but what you choose to do with the talents you have." He brightened as another idea came to him. "Hey, maybe we should have Sokka come and train with us! I'm sure he'd appreciate the practice, and it might make it easier for you to have someone to team up with—"

When he saw the expression on Suki's face, however, he immediately stopped talking, and instead looked to her as he waited for an explanation. "Sokka and I are through," she said at last, her eyes hard and her mouth pressed into a thin line.

"Oh." It was all that he could think to say. He waited further, but Suki clearly didn't want to share more, and Aang didn't want to press her, so they finished their washing-up and left the training ground in silence. Sokka, when Aang saw him next, didn't seem to want to talk about it either, so Aang decided that whatever had happened, it was between them, and as long as no one was getting terribly hurt it was not his business to know.

Time passed. Sokka and Suki still did not seem to want to be within any proximity of each other, and though it made Aang sad, it actually wasn't all that hard to manage. After all, now that he and Katara were through, the six of them hardly ever had occasion to be in the same place anymore.

Their family was breaking apart…

It seemed as if Aang never got to spend much time with anyone anymore. Anyone, that is, except Zuko, with whom he regularly met to oversee decolonization… and Suki.

They were on to three elements now, and Aang knew that it wouldn't be long before they were sparring with all four. In spite of Suki's morose prediction, she had managed to keep up with him, adapting as needed to every new challenge. Sometimes, she even managed to give  _him_  a run for his money—her chi blocking had gotten much better since they'd started, to the point where she could unerringly hit every point on a moving target without causing lasting damage, and Aang had learned not to let her get too close to him if he wanted to make it to the end of the match. What's more, she lately seemed to be increasingly driven: she had entered each sparring match with an intensity so single-minded it almost frightened him, pushing herself up if she was knocked down with no more than a grunt, besting him with everything from fans to katana to her bare fists. She didn't always win, of course—the Avatar could hardly lose so many battles, even to a warrior as skilled as Suki—but he would be lying if he said that he wasn't impressed.

That didn't mean that he couldn't also be worried.

Even though he knew that Suki could be trusted to take care of herself, Aang didn't like the way she was pushing herself. No matter how skilled a fighter might be, knowing one's own limits was essential. Suki was so good at what she did that Aang wasn't sure that she had quite learned hers.

"You know," he ventured after their first session with all four elements, a match which had ended with mud splatters, mussed hair, singed clothing, and both of them soaking wet, "you don't have to prove anything to me."

Suki was still breathing hard, pushing her bedraggled hair out of her face, and she sent him a hard look once she had finished wiping off the last of her running makeup. "What makes you think I'm trying to  _prove_ anything? Especially to you?"

There was a time that Aang might have gone on the defensive, held his hands up and claimed that he hadn't meant any offense before dropping the matter altogether. Now, however, the years had made him into both a wiser Avatar and a wiser person—as well as a better friend.

"Look, Suki," he began, moving to stand beside her. "If I offended you, I apologize. All I'm trying to say is that I respect you, and that if there's anything you ever want to talk about, I'd be happy to listen."

At his words she let out a single breath, her shoulders sagging. "Sorry I snapped." Even though he waited, though, she did not say anything more.

* * *

"Aang."

He looked at her curiously as she stepped into the clearing; she looked hesitant, uncharacteristically so. "I was wondering if you would do me a favor."

"If I can." Whatever it was, it seemed to be bothering her a lot more than was warranted by a simple favor, and it made Aang reluctant to make any unconditional promises. "Go ahead and ask. The very worst that can happen is that you'll be no worse off than before."

Still she hesitated, and Aang could see her gathering her resolve. Finally, she took a breath, raised her head, and looked him directly in the eyes. "I want you to fight me in the Avatar State."

For a second, he was so shocked that he could only blink at her with wide eyes before he finally found his voice. "Wh-what?"

"I want you to fight me in the Avatar State," she repeated. "The whole point of this was to challenge myself. Push myself to my absolute limits. There's no way I can do that if you're not giving it your all either."

"I thought that the  _point_  was to better ourselves." Aang was facing her head on now, and he had finally found his voice, standing before her with his arms outspread as he begged her to reconsider. "Nowhere in my understanding does that include killing each other!"

"For the last time," she snarled, baring her teeth, "you're not going to kill me. Just because I'm not a bender, that doesn't mean I'm  _weak_."

"Is that what this is about?" Aang demanded. "You proving that you're not weak? Suki, you're one of the strongest warriors I've ever had by my side, and that includes almost every bender I know! I already told you, you have nothing to prove to me—and you shouldn't have to prove it to anyone else either."

"Oh? And what if this isn't about you? Did it ever occur to you that maybe I have something to prove to  _myself?_ " She was now breathing hard. "I  _have_  to get better! I have to know that I'm as good as you are! I'm not—" Her eyes glistened. "I'm not going to be the one who always has to rely on  _you!_ "

"Suki." He was in front of her, he realized, grasping both of her hands in his own, squeezing her wrists reassuringly, and though her hands spasmed when he made contact, she did not try to pull away. "What would  _ever_  make you think that I don't rely on  _you?_ "

"Yes—to take care of things on the ground while you're flying around solving the world's problems." She pulled her hands from his grip, and he let her go reluctantly. "I'm never going to be fighting by your side, though—not the way Katara did."

"Katara? Suki, what does Katara have to do with any of—"

Oh.  _Oh._

"You know," he continued slowly, reaching up to grip her shoulders this time, "Katara used to get frustrated a lot, because I picked up on things so easily that she still had trouble with. Yet there were so many things she could do that I couldn't, and I relied on her for that."

Suki looked up at him, her eyes red. Though Aang had outgrown her some time ago, this was the first time he could recall feeling like Suki was actually  _shorter_ —as if she had a reason to look up.

"You also have a strength that I could never have. Not only that, you know what it is to  _earn_  it." Arms still wrapped around her shoulders, he guided her to a nearby rock. Once they were both seated, Aang moved to clasp her hands once more. "Suki, you're not just a good friend, you're one of the bravest women I've ever known, and I… I would be  _honored_  to have you by my side."

"Aang, you can't really mean that."

"When have you ever known me to lie?" He gave a brief smile as he squeezed her hands once more, but then let go with a sigh. "But…"

_A flat white stone, slipping from his hand into the depths of icy water. Don't ever make a promise you're not sure you can keep._

"I can't stop being the Avatar. My first duty is and always will be to the world. If you want permanence and stability… those are things I'm afraid I can't give you."

"They're also things that I never asked for." She shook her head. "Aang, if I hadn't been ready to sacrifice permanence and stability I never would have left my village. What I want—what I've always wanted—is respect, and to know that I've been worthy of it."

At that, Aang could not help but chuckle a little. "Suki, I'd say that having my respect is the  _last_  thing you have to worry about."

Though she did not answer, her silence—not sullen or denying but a comfortable acceptance—told him all that he needed to know. After a few minutes of simple companionable sitting, Aang dared to reach out and wrap an arm around her waist, and Suki pillowed her head on his shoulder in return. It felt right—a rightness he hadn't known since Katara, after which he'd barely dared to touch another girl for fear of finding that that special thing he'd once had was now gone for good, that he'd had his only chance and lost it forever.

Where they were going to go from here, he couldn't have said. Suki had made him no promises, no more than Aang had asked for any, and even in the best of times, being life partner to the Avatar was never easy—but at long last, he thought he had finally found somebody who would rise to the challenge.

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, I am still doing this. Slowly. I really wasn't kidding when I said that romance ain't my forte. But hey, I haven't given up yet!
> 
> So this chapter wraps up the nearest-neighbor pairings (nearest neighbor in terms of elements and in terms of order of joining the Gaang), and also the first round of het pairings. (Don't panic, there will be another.) Next chapter, though, I'll be moving on to the slash.
> 
> ...
> 
> I have hardly ever done slash before. Spirits help me.


End file.
